Things I have now that didn't exist ten years ago.

So I read this article 10 months ago. I am on top of the game!

Of course, when I read it, I looked at my desk. Ancient Mac, lots of rocks, folded laundry, tiny plastic pony... nothing new and strange.

Later, I thought about it in my thinking room- the kitchen. Sure, some of the foods I eat weren't widely available ten years ago- I don't think anyone was excited about fermenting things on their counter then, and no one gave a flying fox about where a tomato came from as long as it was tasty. Also, every bit of kitchen ware I have is ancient- I swear it's permanently 1979 in there. Laurel's influence is still palpable, most of my appliances are from that unfortunate era, and I have relics from the outlaws' first American kitchen. And there's nothing older than filth, right?

I thought about it while driving... I thought about a lot of things while driving. I had a GPS- but my dad had one when I was a tot. My iPod and CDs were stolen, so I was listening to a lot of radio. I wondered if country music was as subtly racist ten years ago. I wondered what was around instead of the hip hop stations. I drank a lot of Starbucks- that was new, right? Were the maps I was using more accurate? Would I be able to do this job without a cell phone?

Anyways. I was at the outlaws, bored out of my skull, when I found the treasure trove of new fancy stuff: my purse. I'm going to list my favorite things that didn't exist when I was in high school.

1.) Cell phone. Most of you have gotten both the "I'm lost, help me find this address" call and the "Walking through a dark parking lot, chatting with you like I'm about to bump into you." call. Amy called me the other day so that someone would know if she fell into the deep pit she was working next to. It makes me show up for more appointments on time, and it makes me feel safe.

2.) Maxalt. In High School, I'd have to stay home or go home with a migraine about once a month. (Exactly. Exactly once a month.) It's not really acceptable at a job- particularly if you're in the middle of nowhere when one strikes. But I have my $25 a dose beta blocking super medication now- I take one, the headache's gone in ten minutes, and I get all giddy and silly because my brain chemistry's been radically altered. Yay pharmaceuticals!

3.) Zyrtec. My major migraine trigger? Pollen. (and stress, and loud noise, and perfume and...) Benedryl? Yeah, I can't really function on Benedryl. Last time I took it was after my stinging- I don't know how much of the weakness, shaking, and body aches was due to eight wasp stings, and how much was due to a potent antihistamine. Which is why I love my impotent antihistamine.

4.) Chicobag reusable shopping bag.

5.) Thumb Drive. It has a current resume, a decent headshot, and the hulking relics of whatever project I haven't deleted yet. Oh, and a complete key to the flora of the Northwest. With pictures.

6.) Tamarind flavored candy.

7.) Burt's Bees chapstick. All my wussy chemical sensitivities confined me to Carmex ten years ago. Or, you know, butter. Or horrifically chapped lips.

You'll also find Ibuprophen, a ball of string: so I can find my way out of a maze, a prism: in case I get transported back in time and need to barter my way to power, and smooth rocks.

I'm not sure how much I've matured in the last ten years versus how much the world has decided to support people as scattered, disorganized, and physiologically incompetent as I am. We'll find out after the crash, eh? Eh?