I know talking about TV is terrible conversation, but I hate it when I recommend a show to someone, and they smirk (the smirk is critical) and say "I don't watch commercial television." I don't mind people not having TV- hell, I don't have a TV- but I mind the smirk. I mind it more when it's someone so keyed into the internet that you could probably cobble together a perfect AI replica of their personality from all their Facebook and Twitter updates. One glowing rectangle is not superior to the other!

Anyoldway, I think I've found a way to defeat this. I just start ranting about a childhood without television, the social isolation, the lack of a shared culture, and the inability to avoid watching any flashing screen in my peripheral vision. Said screen could be showing test patterns or judicial nominee hearings and Clive Owen could be making out with Jake Gyllanhaal right next to me, and I would still stare at the screen. There, smirker. You don't want to talk about television shows? Let's talk about my blighted years in junior high instead. Remember you wanted to derail the conversation first.

I have not found a way to explain that I don't have a TV without sounding like one of the smirkers. Really! It's essential! Allow me to show you the deep dip in my college transcript that perfectly overlaps our time with free cable! I totally still watch things online!